Enjoy our exclusive interview with lead actor Elena Milo, as we talk all things Last ExMas and its incredible role in the queer canon of filmmaking.
- By Liv Eveleigh
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At last, a lesbian Christmas rom-com! This year, Canadian filmmaker, Sarah Rotella and writer, Adrianna DiLonardo have made sure to make the festive season just a little bit gayer. Last ExMas is a fantastically funny rom-com premiering this year at the Iris Prize LGBTQ+ film festival. Last ExMas is refreshingly laid-back, filled with joy, authenticity, and relatable moments. As Elena puts it: “being queer is not a tragedy”, and that is something at the heart of this film.
ELENA MILO (Maggie Pierce)_Last ExMas
Elena, a Toronto-based actor, plays Maggie in Last ExMas, her first feature film. Having come from a theatre background with years of experience, the film marks a major milestone in her career. What is perhaps most unique about this experience is the actor’s sense of connection to the women behind this project. Growing up in London, Canada, as a young queer woman, Elena remarks upon how important Sarah and Adrianna’s YouTube channel (the one and only gaywomenschannel) was to her as a closeted teen. She describes how landing this role felt like “a full circle moment”. Working alongside some of her role models and an incredible ensemble of women and queer people, Elena experienced an immense sense of comfort and community during the film’s creation. Read on to discover the rich tapestry of women's voices and experiences that are seamlessly woven into the heart of this remarkable film.
SHAEANE JIMENEZ (Julianne Alba)_Last ExMasSo, let’s start off with… how did you come into this role?
“So originally, I just did an audition, it was a self-tape through my agent and I remember I was gonna go film it with my coach but I ended up being like deathly sick, I was so sick… but whatever. I’m just gonna film it at home and I'm just gonna send it in. I didn’t hear anything for a long time… and then they asked me to do a call back! My call back was actually with my co-star Shaeane! …and then I managed to book it! Which is so funny, it kind of felt like a big full circle moment for me because growing up as a queer kid - and I was closeted in high school - I used to watch Sarah and Adrianna’s YouTube videos… and now I'm in their project! Which is so crazy!”
ELENA MILO & SHAEANE JIMENEZ Nominated for Best performance in a female role in a feature film sponsored by Diva Magazine
Part of what is so fantastic and refreshing about Last ExMas is that it’s a classic Christmas rom-com, except for the fact that the protagonists are gay. There’s no coming out story, there’s no homophobia, it’s warm, it’s funny. How important do you think this type of representation is?
“Beyond important. I think there’s obviously a huge place for people to make these films about queer hardship, but I think it’s important to show and send a message that being queer is not a tragedy. That you’re not doomed. It’s not that you're not going to have difficult parts of that, because it’s still a difficult thing - sometimes - but it’s not all bad. And you are worthy of a happy and easy-going life full of acceptance and love.”
“In the real world, often, being from a more western country, obviously this is a privilege, but usually I find even, personally, my relationships, the hardship in it is no longer about coming out, it’s about the real issues that happen just between two people who love each other or used to love each other or hate each other. Like you said, it is very refreshing and I think the whole point of a rom-com is to give people something easy to watch, something that gives them levity and happiness and why shouldn't queer people have that as well with their stories that are being told?”
You mentioned having had similar experiences. Are there either of the characters or any of the characters that you do specifically relate to?
“I think Maggie is very much like me, I think I gave a lot of myself to her. I think she uses a sort of guarded stand offish, offensive technique in order to protect herself. I think I really related to that. I think she was really hurt in her past relationship with Julianne and coming to where she is, at this point in the film, she not only has all of this stuff coming back from the past but she’s also coming back to her home town feeling like a little bit of a failure… I think all of that combined makes Maggie feel really small and it kind of causes her to overcompensate …but then deep down, I think you kind of end up really seeing her heart in it all. I hope.”
Sarah Rotella, Director, Last ExMasSomething else we cannot forget to mention are the women behind this project. What was it like working with Sarah and Adrianna, helping bring their vision to life? Have you worked on many other projects completely spearheaded by women?
“I think this is the only one. I have been in projects that are directed by women which is amazing. I did do a play, when I was in school where the cast was very intentionally, and the crew for the most part, were all women or a part of the queer community, but I feel like this film really took it to another level.”
“I think just such a huge thing that stands out is the level of… comfortability that it brought to the project. I think we just got so lucky with the cast and the crew, and everybody was so incredibly respectful, and I made some incredible friends who I am still friends with and hope to be friends with forever! But I think that Sarah and Adrianna’s approach to be really one with all of us and super collaborative with everybody… felt like people were able to bring their own ideas and bring their own voices into the space …I think that’s something… I mean I don’t know if that is something unique to women but I think that it’s something that happens more with women because women are so used to being far more silenced… they’re more aware of the need to listen to other people’s voices”
So, as we have mentioned, the creators of Last Exmas - Sarah and Adrianna - are queer women themselves. Did this create a unique feel with the project, and did you feel as though the film is reflective of yourself as a queer woman?
“I think it's just so clear in their writing that it's written by people who are representative of these characters and these stories. And not to say that this is something exclusive to men, but I think it's also nice that it in no way, shape or form felt like any kind of fetishization or... And it just felt very simple and easy going. It maybe dips into stereotypes and jokes a little bit, but for the most part, it's just so grounded and real and simple and funny. You can tell that Sarah and Adrianna really put bits of themselves into the characters and the stories. “It was such an easy script to act… sometimes you get a script where you can't even figure out how to say it in a way that feels real or natural, whereas with this script, it was just so… the way that Adriana wrote this, it made the acting so easy.”
Do you have a favourite scene? Or what was your favourite scene to act in the movie?
“I think probably the most fun to film, although I was freezing my little **** off, which was a very common thing throughout this movie. I was so cold! but filming those drag scenes… I don't know what it looks like in the film, but there was not a single take that I did not laugh through… It was just such a memorable, memorable thing. It was just absurd!”
Looking ahead to the next steps in your career, are you interested in continuing with this genre, feature films, or queer cinema? What would be your ideal direction?
“This film changed a lot for me. When I first auditioned for the film, I kind of got that it was a romance movie, but I didn't have access to the whole script. We auditioned with two scenes. And so, I didn't really know the whole vibe of the project. And I've always been like, I'm a dramatic actor, I can't do comedy. So, I just don't do comedy. That's not a thing that I'm gonna do. And I ended up booking it and they sent me the script and I sat here while I read the script for the first time and I went, oh, this is funny. Oh, this is a comedy. OK, OK. Now we panic because… I'm really scared of comedy. I find it really, really difficult. It's such a challenge for me because I think in my everyday life… I feel like I'm a little bit deadpan. And so, I struggle with the idea of acting in a comedic way. So, this was kind of another big first for me.”
“I would love love love to work on more queer cinema. I think it's… so important working on queer sets. This one was incredible. And I want to share more stories like this. So honestly, who knows?”
How far away do you think we are from having lesbian hallmark movies?
“It's funny because when I told people I was doing this film, almost every single person went, is it Hallmark?I'm like, no, it's not Hallmark. I don't know. I think a big part of me is very hopeful… but I find a lot of people in some ways aren't accepting or ready for that. I hope that it'll change one day.”
“Sometimes you need to make waves before everybody is ready and be ok with the risk that you’re taking because it matters”
“It sort of reminds me when I was in high school, I did a musical… in my hometown, at the Grand Theatre. Every year they do this thing called The High School Project where at a professional theatre they do a production fully cast with high school kids. And in 2018, they’d chosen the musical… it was called Prom Queen. Now it's called The Louder We Get, and it was a true story about a Canadian boy named Marc Hall who wanted to take his boyfriend to the prom and was denied the right to do that by his Catholic school… and in true ironic fashion, when they announced this, both the public school and catholic school board pulled out their funding. [The theatre] put out a statement saying, no, we’re going to do this anyway, because we believe in the project. We believe that it's important and it's an important story to tell. Eventually, the public school board put their money back in… did a GoFundMe and ended up getting even more money than they had initially been expecting to get from both of the school boards.”
“So I think that's just a great example of sticking to your guns and going forward with something, even if a certain part of the public isn't ready to accept it. The support and acceptance you get from everyone else can end up being more in the end. And it can become something incredible. And it was incredible. It was.”
Were you taken aback when they withdrew at that point? Earlier, you mentioned that many of the challenges you might face are lessened due to being in a typically more liberal Western environment. Did you expect that response at the time?
“Almost. I think I didn't expect it from both the school boards but… I had only come out for the first time just a few months prior to auditioning for this musical… and so I think I still felt a lot of fear around queerness. I had yet to see the positive parts, which again, is why it's so important to tell stories that aren't so tragic.”
You've done theatre, and now you've completed a film—who knows what’s next on your journey! What does acting mean to you personally? Is it about conveying certain messages, or do you do it simply for the love of the craft? What kind of creative drive fuels your work?
“I mean, for me, it's, it's such a drive… I know I can't do anything else. I've tried! I think being an actor is one of the greatest things. You're encouraged to show the parts of yourself that in the real world people don't want to see and you're not supposed to show and you don't want to show… acting and film begs you to show that, it's like there's a wall between the outside world and what happens on camera.” “It’s a totally different world.”
“I think acting also in turn makes you a better person cause you're required to learn more about the world.You're required to learn more about people that are so unlike yourself or stories that you know nothing about, life experiences that you've never felt.”
So, to wrap things up, I think what we’ve been discussing—about what acting allows you to express and what Last Exmas has showcased—is the portrayal of genuine human interaction and authentic relationship dynamics.And I think that potentially my last question to you is: What do you think the audience are going to think and feel when they see this relationship on screen?
“I think so many people are gonna relate to this love story… because again, it's just a true telling of a relationship as it is. “It’s a story about family and about coming back to your past and being confronted with the question of what is important to you?” “I think that people, whether they're queer, lesbians or in a relationship or single or whatever, everyone's going to find themselves in this film. “Whether it's in Maggie and Jules's relationship, whether it's in the families, in the community of the town, I think people are going to love it because you can find little pieces of everybody all throughout the story.” “And I think that hopefully people are just going to feel a whole lot of joy. That's my hope because I was full of joy working on it. So I hope it does the same for those watching.”
Looking ahead to the next steps in your career, are you interested in continuing with this genre, feature films, or queer cinema? What would be your ideal direction?
You've done theatre, and now you've completed a film—who knows what’s next on your journey! What does acting mean to you personally? Is it about conveying certain messages, or do you do it simply for the love of the craft? What kind of creative drive fuels your work?
